Monday, April 25, 2016

News From Flathead County

The Police Blotter column from the Flathead County Beacon in Kalispell, Montana is always entertaining. My favorite 'report' is in bold italics.
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Unwanted Visitor

9:25 a.m. A local woman saw someone in a beat-up Gremlin drive down a swampy road near the river. The Gremlin, she felt, was cause for concern.
11:28 a.m. A Kila woman reported that employees of the Internal Revenue Service were at her house harassing her for money.
12:21 p.m. A black lab in Evergreen jumped a tall fence and ran behind the Town Pump.
2:43 p.m. Someone from a Kalispell business complained that customers keep driving over their rock displays.
3:02 p.m. A Whitefish resident claimed that her neighbor was in his driveway shooting at old appliances with his shotgun. The caller worried about passers by and wayward bird shot.
6:01 p.m. A Whitefish woman reported that a shepherd wearing a bandana frequently visits her at home and she’s tired of it.
7:04 p.m. A man with brown hair ran a stop sign on Lion Mountain Road.
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Having shepherds visit is daunting enough. When they have headgear, it's intimidating. And what are the sheep doing while this guy is at her house? Are they in the yard? Hard to say. Shepherding can be lonely business, but I'm sure they explained that at the job interview.

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