Thursday, April 21, 2016

An Apology

I sometimes have to apologize for shooting off my mouth in places where it actually gets heard. It's a good thing that I am not a diplomat. There would be war. I will have to say that I never thought I would be 'heard' here. Frankly, there are few that read this drivel, especially when I go all narcissistic. TDGH is a place where I publish my thoughts. It's like putting one's journal or diary out there for everyone to read. The Lord said that what's inside a man is what makes him unclean. What's in the heart sometimes ends up on the tongue, or in my case, on the pages of this blog. In my defense, I do learn from what I write, but I also get a cheap thrill from speculation about people, places and things of which I know NOTHING about. This is probably not good. It's a case of oversharing at best and completely defamatory at worst. If you have been a victim of my thought processes and my writing and my venting of opinion, I am sorry and I apologize to you right here and now. Just know that no one really reads his stuff with the exception of a handful of people that either care about me or like to laugh at me as I push my way through this life.  

Anyhow, what follows here is assumption on my part, sprinkled with guilt and some fair amount of regret, sorrow and repentance. Do with it what you will and if it does not apply to you, please feel free to move on.

On February 9th and later on March 2nd I wrote blog posts which might be seen as gossipy, critical and unkind. The 2/9 post was entitled, "Two Preachers, Two Laptops and a Cup of Coffee". I was eavesdropping on conversations of a couple of local pastors and commenting about their discussion. First, I apologize for eavesdropping. It's a horrible practice. I am usually way too good at blocking out the real world. I should have been doing it on the day in question. If anything I wrote was particularly offensive, I am sorry.

The March post "The Reluctant Host" was a similar situation. It involved more pastors and I singled one out that I had judged. I know. Who am I to judge another man's servant right? But I did it anyway and I am sorry. So if you are the one I described as the fat, bearded one that I tagged with an unfortunate label, I am sorry. I had no right to make assumptions about who you are, especially since I do not even know you. It was a grievous sin. I am ashamed I did it and I repent of it. You are, no doubt, an honorable man, otherwise you would never have been placed in charge of a portion of His flock.

So why am I doing this? Well, I do have a conscience. It has been bothering me that I did these things. I have also sensed some bad feelings from the featured men in this group. It is certainly understandable. Beyond that, I think I got caught!

Many of us do not realize the full impact of our sin until we actually get caught. I noticed on either Monday or Tuesday that there was Facebook traffic pointed toward the blog and two specific posts were receiving attention. These would be the ones mentioned above. Getting caught helps push one  toward either digging their heels in or to repentance. I have chosen the latter. Brian, I am sorry. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

I do not know how you guys found my blog. I'm thinking it had to be a family member that passed on a link to one of you or maybe someone from my church. Whatever. You seem to have credited me with having the smarts to figure out what was going on so I could finally do the right thing. Thanks much. The Spirit continues to work. He has His hands full with me.

We live and least I do. Sometimes others get hurt in the process. Collateral damage is never good or excusable. I will endeavor to do better. Thanks for reading. The offending posts have been removed.