NOTWIR..and it's only Friday

NOTWIR is an acronym for News Of The Week In Review. It's from a novel by James Kirkwood. I think the title was "Some Kind Of Hero". He also wrote "P.S. Your Cat is Dead". If you want to read what I was reading back in the 70's, try one of those. My friend, Brian Kirkpatrick, from high school put me on to Kirkwood. Very enjoyable. My opinion. I know. Opinions are like anuses. Everyone has one and they all stink...except mine of course...just got out of the shower. But I digress...as usual.

So this week started poorly. I did not feel good. I was tired and mopey. I fell asleep at work. Bad dreams about being eaten by raccoons. Too cold. Too warm. Blah, Blah, Blah. After some thought, I put my ague down to bad mushrooms on a pizza from Sunday. When I got the mushrooms out of the fridge, I knew they had some age on them, but I used them anyway. The pizza went down nicely, but when it finally made its exit, I felt so much better.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but work has been a bitch this week. I got a new laptop with Windows 10 and a touch screen. Everything seems to be working OK and all my files transferred successfully, but I cannot print worth a shiite if I might be so bold. I receive these large PDF's in email daily that contain the day work from our Cedar Rapids office and they take forever to print. I think it has to do with the age of the copier that I print to. It is not Windows 10 ready. I got an updated printer driver for the new laptop, but that does not seem to matter. I'm thinking maybe the copier needs a driver or a chip set or something. A 40 page document will print at about one page every 5 seconds. That's a lifetime in terms of what is supposed to be a laser printer.

Then there's the drama. It's personal drama. It's "R" rated so you might want to stop right here unless you're used to me and my proclivities. Warm weather makes me horny. I know. Probably too blunt, but it is nonetheless true. I think it's because people dress for the weather. Men will wear gym shorts and a T-shirt. They tend to be nicely tanned with furry legs. I do not seem to care what size, shape, age or color they are. They all fascinate me. It makes me want to pick one, settle down and get married...I know I can't, but such is the fantasy as I sit in the Hy Vee parking lot watching the humanity pass by.

Last night, after work, I went to the Hy Vee in Altoona. I did my shopping. As I was checking out, I could hear it pouring down rain outside. I ended up waiting at the exit with a number of others for the rain to stop before going to the parking lot. About that time, two young guys in gym shorts and tanks in their 20's walked in and they were soaked to the skin from the rain. I think they had been out jogging. Their wet clothes gave perfect outline to their entire bodies. They were beautiful. Absolutely nothing left to the imagination. I smiled. I'm sure I blushed. I did not care. One of them smiled back at me. More blushing. Then they went about their business and I went to the parking lot. I did not care if it was raining. The cold shower helped a bit.

Does writing about this stuff help? Not exactly, but neither does holding it all in. That makes it even worse. I am a man that has no outlet for my desires, my need for the fleshly side of love. My brain and body tells me to go for it. It feels perfectly natural. But my commitment is to Another and He says 'NO".

Everyday I wonder why He made me this way. I know some of you will insist that He did not. I know that He did. How can I not feel the sense of unfairness in it all? Why can I not ask, "why did You make me this way?" There are days when I could just scream it out loud.

Why is this struggle relevant to Him and what am I supposed to take from it all?

"OK mouse, here is your cheese. It's different from everyone else's, so you can't have any. Nonetheless, here it is right in front of you. Don't you dare touch it or I will spring the trap."

Is there another way to look at this? Ya, probably, but when you're horny, it's hard to see the forest for all the men that are in the way. Mixed metaphors. This is what I have been relegated to.

Thanks for coming to my pity party. I do feel a bit better now. I think I will have a late breakfast. No cheese though.        

Don Juan Quotes - Updated

So what I'm finding is that Don Juan was a fictional character known for his lack of discretion in sexual matters. He was a womanizer and a bit of warrior that "lived" in the 14th century. His story is told by a Spanish playwright in the 15th century. Other writer's like Lord Byron took up the mythology of Don Juan and told other stories about him. Even so, he is never portrayed as a moral man, though he does, from time to time, exhibit sympathy and even empathy in his travails throughout the European world.   

I find all of this interesting because of the quotes I have found attributed to him. He seems wise in the extreme and yet his words seem to be designed for one thing - to seduce. And this is what his character always seems to be about....seducing women, seducing people to bend them to his will even trying to trick God at one point near death. He is much like the Accuser of old in this respect. Mixing truth with a lie has always been the MO of our mutual Adversary.

------------------------------------------

I am finding these quotes from Don Juan more than interesting. I may have to undertake a study.

Self-importance is man's greatest enemy. What weakens him is
feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of his fellow men.
Self-importance requires that one spend most of one's life offended
by something or someone.

 As long as a man feels that he is the most important thing in
the world, he cannot really appreciate the world around him. He is
like a horse with blinders; all he sees is himself, apart from
everything else.

 The worst that could happen to us is that we have to die, and
since that is already our unalterable fate, we are free; those who
have lost everything no longer have anything to fear.

 Feeling important makes one heavy, clumsy and vain. To be a warrior one needs to be light and fluid.

 To be angry at people means that one considers their acts to be important. It is imperative to cease to feel that way. The acts of men cannot be important enough to offset our only viable alternative: our unchangeable encounter with infinity.

Caribou Church

I frequent the Caribou coffee shop in Pleasant Hill on most mornings. I have not been in attendance as much as usual this week. I have not been up to it. I've been feeling odd; very tired and sleepy, even after a full night of rest. I'm not sure what's going on. I fell asleep at work yesterday. That was embarrassing. I suppose I should go to the doctor. I really don't want to though. It's my experience that the doctor wants to cure any number of things that are not bothering me, but he never has any answers to stuff like this. I suppose it could be age related or maybe I just need a vacation. Whatever it is, I could use a nap right now.

It's kind of quiet at Caribou this morning. Normally it's a hub of caffeinated chatter that's so loud one can barely hear one's self think. It reminds me of church in some ways. People sitting around drinking coffee and talking about absolutely nothing of import. There are exceptions to this. I have seen tears and arguments. I have heard the police discussing drug busts and drunks. And there is the book club on Thursdays that never seems to have any books with them. There are also days when the place is infested with pastors - some talking shop and others not talking at all. It's a good place to get a cross section of white middle class humanity with the occasional smattering of minority members in the mix. Now that I think about it, I guess I would qualify as a genuine minority in this group. How many gay Christians do you know? Unless you know me, probably none. Jesus knows quite a few of us, but I digress. If He were here, I think He would stop by for a decaf latte and a bag of olives. Middle eastern types seem to enjoy olives.

I suppose you're asking yourself, "What's he talking about? A bag of olives? Since when do olives come in bags?"

I kid you not; this coffee shop has Caribou brand olives in a vacuum packed bag next to the dark chocolate covered coffee beans and biscotti. I told the cashier that I would eat many things with my cappuccino, but olives was not one of them. I really don't like them anyway, but with coffee? Really? I don't think so.       

I'm a bit peckish this morning. Maybe I should go over to the Market Grill and get some scrambled eggs and bacon. That should put me right to sleep eh? It sounds really good though. I love eggs and bacon. There's nothing like freshly cooked chicken embryos and smoked, fried porcine shavings to get you going in the morning. A bowl of cereal just will not cover what I need. Neither will a bag of olives.  

Speaking of food, the Iowa State Fair is coming up next week. I am supposed to attend on the 13th with Jeffery's Angels. I think we will be short one Angel. We will see what happens. I wonder if they will have deep fried olives on a stick? There's a concept. I hope it has not come to that. I'm praying for a cool cloudy day on the 13th.

Time for a refill now as I commune with the Saints at Caribou. Hold the olives please.

Blog Statistics

My blog stats have been off the charts weird this week. It seems that there are certain subjects that can bring all sorts attention. I have been heavily scanned by Russian and US sources and they have been reaching far back into the archives of TDGH. Key words that seem to set off this avalanche of non reading hits seem to be "Trump", "Putin", "terrorism" and "ISIS". These sources do not seem to be nearly as interested in "Hillary" or "sin" or "self righteousness" or "Jesus". When you consider that I have only two subscribers and maybe 15 to 20 regular readers, this is a really odd week.

Pageviews by Countries

Entry	Pageviews
United States	190
Russia	160
Germany	13
France	5
Australia	4
United Kingdom	2
Norway	1
New Zealand	1

Pageviews by Browsers Entry Pageviews Firefox 199 (38%) Internet Explorer 164 (31%) Chrome 86 (16%) Safari 53 (10%) SamsungBrowser 11 (2%) Mobile 8 (1%) GSA 1 (<1%) chromeframe 1 (<1%) Pageviews by Operating Systems Entry Pageviews Windows 234 (44%) Unix 140 (26%) iPhone 35 (6%) Macintosh 34 (6%) Linux 26 (4%) iPad 24 (4%) Android 17 (3%) compatible 13 (2%)

Apparently I'm Tired...

I usually know these things. I guess I have not been closely attending to my bodily needs, not to put too fine a point on it. Yesterday I felt like I was getting the flu. I was achy and sleepy all day. Then last night before bed, I thought I had a fever. I could not get warm even after I got under the covers. Then I fell into this deep paralytic sleep and dreamed I was sleeping outdoors with nothing but a blanket while raccoons and opossums annoyed me; it was like they were scratching me or something. I think it's because the dog was in bed with me. He just got a haircut and I think he was cold too. He looks kind of like a goat now, but I digress.

Anyway, I woke up at about 1230. I got up to pee. Us old guys have to do that. It has something to do with prostate enlargement. The poor thing never gets used anyway. It's probably the size of a grapefruit. Again, I digress.

After that, I returned to bed. I was having trouble getting back to sleep. I think I prayed a bit. I can usually depend on God to put me back to sleep. I think He tires of the annoyance. Then I dozed off again, I slept through my alarm right up to about 0815 AM today.

I feel refreshed, but I also feel like a bit of a layabout. I actually think I could have slept some more, but I didn't. I think I might be depressed. At this point in my life, I do not notice such things. It's weird how that works. Anyway, I feel pretty good right now. We will see how the rest of the day goes.

Take care and I love y'all.   

Understanding God...Like That Will Ever Happen

I really don't understand Him. He baffles me. He wants me to be be holy. He holds up the standard. Then He watches me struggle my way to victory or defeat; to congratulations or repentance.

Does He enjoy the process more than the product? Is bringing His children to full sanctification the great, divine pleasure that is above everything else for Him? I have to wonder.

Having never been a parent, I have not known the joys of raising up a child in the way he should go. I am thinking though, that this is what God is doing for His children as we go through this life. Like every parent, I suppose He wins some and He loses others. I also think that none of us will ever forget Him though we might fail to please Him. How could anyone turn their back on a Father that gave up His own Son for the sake of the other adopted children in the family? There are many that do not believe He even exists or that Jesus Christ is His Son. They believe His Words to be the product of men's imaginations, written only to control behavior. I cannot go there. I have known His love and I want more.

He told Isaiah this:

  Seek the Lord while he may be found;
    call on him while he is near.
  Let the wicked forsake their ways
    and the unrighteous their thoughts.
 Let them turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on them,
    and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
    declares the Lord.
 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts."

I have known His love and I want more. So what is standing in my way? I must be able to sacrifice my short term and often destructive desires to that purpose. It is a hard thing. He knows this. He seems to enjoy the process where I, where we suffer, to seek His favor. 

I have asked Him, I have asked myself, is this not cruel in the extreme? I feel Him smiling at me. I hear Him say, "You'll get over it. Do what is right. I AM here".

"Well Jeff, you're just hearing voices, you're a religious extremist, you're nuts." I get this from unbelieving friends frequently. They want to know why I bother with the struggle. I have come to believe that in struggle there is truth and life and God. I am renewed by both victory and failure because He lives in me and makes that renewal happen. I have not just read about it. It happens to me on a daily basis. It is real and I cannot explain it in any satisfactory way other than I know I am His child and He will NEVER let me go. I would be miserable without Him anyway. 

So Lord, lets do another day. Please drive our mutual adversary back to the Pit. Let's have a day of victory. We can do it together. Just You and me. Thanks.   

On Forgiving God

As most everyone is aware, Jesus was big on forgiveness. He wants to forgive us and He wants us to forgive each other. When Simon Peter asked Him how many times he should forgive his brother, Jesus was very direct. Matthew 18:21, 22 say,

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?
Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times."

Then in Luke 23:32-34, Luke writes,

Two other men, both criminals, were also led out with Him to be executed. When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified Him, along with the criminals - one on His right, the other on His left. Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

Jesus wanted us to forgive, even as He forgives. That's a tall order.

What Jesus never talks about though is forgiving God.

Blasphemy? Did you say that was blasphemy? Yes, I know. God is God. He does not sin. He is not capable of sin or sinning against anyone. Why would He need forgiveness, particularly from one of His creations?

Let me suggest that forgiveness may be required, even when sin is absent. Sin requires forgiveness, but so do misunderstandings, so do people that do the right thing though it may hurt others, so do people who act in ignorance.

Everyday, people are born into the world in various states of difficulty. Like Job, they seemingly suffer for no reason. Everyday natural disasters occur that wreak havoc on families and property. They destroy and they kill.

We sometimes ask, where was God? Where is God? Why does He not do something to stop all this needless suffering?

We do this because we do not understand. We do not get the bigger picture. We cannot see the forest for the trees. We do not have a God's eye view of the reality that He created and how it must work to achieve the maximum benefit. We are not God.

Our failure to fully grock His purpose will oft times make us angry or rebellious or worse, hopeless.

This is when we need to take advantage of what He taught us.

We need to forgive Him.

He is always faithful to forgive us. Why should we be so short sighted as to not accord Him the same privilege simply because we do not understand His purpose?

You may think I am way off base here, but I think there are many, both Christian and otherwise, that need to look to forgiving their creator for perceived injustices or bad creation management. Who are we to critique the Creator of the Universe?

We are in His hands, whether we realize it or not. We are His children. For the sake of family accord, let's forgive what we do not understand and move forward with Him. Someday we may know what we do not know now - or - better yet, we will not care.

Let's enjoy His love and deal with whatever reality we were dealt as best we can. When 'Forever' comes, I think we will all be glad we did.       

The Urban Dictionary Defines "Jeffery"

My thought here is that one should not use the Urban Dictionary when seeking a definition of one's name. I am shocked at what common parlance has relegated me to. "Jeffery" has almost become a swear word. I am really not any of the things below. You may have a different opinion.


Jeffery

A sweet, fuzzy, cuddly, bootylicious teddy bear.

Jeffery has a sweet booty!

Or

Jeffery

kind hearted spirit, who cares about all.
jeffery is someone thats sets something aside in order to help a friend.

Or

Jeffery

A player who likes to smoke weed and have sex a lot. He will be extremely nice until you fall for him then he will act like you never meant a thing to him.

Dude why are you being such a Jeffery?

Or

Jeffery

a drug cocktail in joint form consisting of, weed, angel dust, E, clorox, cocaine, and a few other choice ingredients.

Or

Jeffery

Another word for a 7 1/2 inch penis

Damn!! You got a Jeffery

Or

Jeffery

A romantic loose end that will negatively impact future relationships.

A social satellite that could re-enter your orbit as a dangerous asteroid at any moment.

So I was on a date, and that girl I had that awkward fling with was the bartender at the bar. She's such a Jeffery.

Or

Jeffery

the kind of guy to be cute and cuddly when he's drunk, but when he's sober he's a bastard that will never follow you back on twitter.

"don't be a jeffery right now"

First Gay President?

James Buchanan was a one term President that served from 1857 to 1861. He was a confirmed politician and bachelor from Pennsylvania. He was briefly engaged to an heiress named Ann Coleman in 1819, but he appears to have been more interested in her money than her person. She committed suicide that same year. The thought of marriage to James must have been too depressing.

James Buchanan, left; J.R. King, right.

Fast forward to Washington.

Historian James W. Loewen has done extensive research into Buchanan’s personal life, and he’s convinced Buchanan was gay.
Loewen is the author of the acclaimed book “Lies Across America,” which examines how historical sites inaccurately portray figures and events in America’s past.
“I’m sure that Buchanan was gay,” Loewen said. “There is clear evidence that he was gay. And since I haven’t seen any evidence that he was heterosexual, I don’t believe he was bisexual.”
According to Loewen, Buchanan shared a residence with William Rufus King, a Democratic senator from Alabama, for several years in Washington, D.C.
Loewen said contemporary records indicate the two men were inseparable, and wags would refer to them as “the Siamese twins.”
Loewen also said Buchanan was “fairly open” about his relationship with King, causing some colleagues to view the men as a couple.
For example, Aaron Brown, a prominent Democrat, writing to Mrs. James K. Polk, referred to King as Buchanan’s “better half,” “his wife” and “Aunt Fancy … rigged out in her best clothes.”
In 1844, when King was appointed minister to France, he wrote Buchanan, “I am selfish enough to hope you will not be able to procure an associate who will cause you to feel no regret at our separation.”
Loewen also said a letter Buchanan wrote to a friend after King went to France shows the depth of his feeling for King.
“I am now solitary and alone, having no companion in the house with me,” Buchanan wrote. “I have gone a wooing to several gentlemen, but have not succeeded with any one of them. I feel that it is not good for man to be alone; and should not be astonished to find myself married to some old maid who can nurse me when I am sick provide good dinners for me when I am well, and not expect from me any very ardent or romantic affection.”

Wow. That's kind of telling. I guess there really is nothing new under the sun.

Observations

This observation came by way of my neighbor down the road...

If Hillary Clinton is elected President, it will be the first time in history that two Presidents have slept with each other...probably.

If Donald Trump is elected President, it will be the first time  in history that a billionaire moves into public housing that was recently vacated by a black family.

I'm telling you, whoever wins this, we are in for a long, strange trip. The immediate future is not bright.

Putin and The Donald...Could it Be Love?

According to Josh Marshall at TalkingPointsMemo.com :

Over the last year there has been a recurrent refrain about the seeming bromance between Donald Trump and Russian President Vladimir Putin. More seriously, but relatedly, many believe Trump is an admirer and would-be emulator of Putin's increasingly autocratic and illiberal rule. But there's quite a bit more to the story. At a minimum, Trump appears to have a deep financial dependence on Russian money from persons close to Putin. And this is matched to a conspicuous solicitousness to Russian foreign policy interests where they come into conflict with US policies which go back decades through administrations of both parties. There is also something between a non-trivial and a substantial amount of evidence suggesting Putin-backed financial support for Trump or a non-tacit alliance between the two men.

Looks like a real issue here. American banks shut off the cash to Donald, so he goes to the Russian oligarchs closely tied to Vlad for cash. It makes sense. It makes one heck of a campaign issue for HRC to work. Who owns Trump? We thought no one owned him. Seems the evil empire has their hooks in him.

Don't get me wrong. I have admired Putin for awhile. He is the only one truly fighting ISIS. He is also fighting illegal immigration.  Obama's phony war against terrorism has been useless and he could care less about the invasion taking place stateside. The Caucasian world is under attack from all sides in Europe and the US and Putin is the only one fighting back. We could use that kind of backbone here in the US.

Even so, historically, what has been good for Mother Russia has not necessarily been good for Uncle Sam. It worries me. I'm not happy that HRC is in bed with the neocons and their wars of aggression in the middle east either. The reason all these Muslims are leaving their countries for Europe and the US is because the USA has left their countries in a shambles. As a  former US Secretary of State, Hillary is responsible for much of that mayhem.

In terms of foreign relations, we are screwed whether we get Trump or Clinton. We can't vote against both of them...darn it. Whatever happens, it's gonna be a real mess. Fun times ahead.       

9

Managing Expectations

There are at least a couple of Rolling Stones songs that I have always appreciated. 'Satisfaction' and 'You Can't Always Get What You Want' come to mind here. I used to joke that these would be sung at my funeral. If you are someone that is perennially disappointed with the state of things, you would appreciate the intent of this music. Buyer's remorse is a common affliction in a consumer society such as ours and then there is the disappointment that comes after plans or intentions go awry. This is the worst...except for... when people let us down or when we perceive that this has happened. The things we expect from each other and the things we actually do are many times very different or are perceived that way. Some of this comes from a failure to understand one another or even bad communication. Some of it is a result of how much we care about what is expected. Mostly though, I think we always expect more than others have to offer. This is a failure to manage expectations. One person does not get what he wants; he expected much more than was offered. The other did not understand what was expected and offered something less than what was desired or something that was not desired at all. And there are some, especially in leadership positions in our world, that use expectations to manipulate and motivate or create covetousness or desire to promote themselves.

What I am saying is that we have to manage our expectations. As Mick Jagger informed me many years ago, we cannot always get what we want. Satisfaction will be elusive unless we manage our expectations. We will constantly be disappointed in everything; people, products, friends, family or even life will seem unsatisfactory.

I tend to be an idealist about some things, particularly spiritual matters. I have a 'vision' about how things should be. I have been constructing it in my mind for decades. I have written about it, talked about it and even taught it. I am genuinely shocked when people I respect disagree with it and I begin to suspect that maybe they are not as spiritual or as knowledgeable as I thought they were. Then I get angry when they embrace part of what I teach them and then do something that I see as a complete contradiction to my 'vision'.  

I fail to manage my expectations. Sometimes my expectations are unreasonable. There is also the possibility that I may be wrong.; oh...that hurt.

My friends are not the way I want them to be. They are just the way the are, as God made them. Who am I to be dissatisfied or disappointed? Who am I to disrespect them because I feel let down over something that I should not have expected in the first place?

I hope you see where I am going with this. What we want, what we need and what we get are often three different things. We have to deal with it and not become despondent or angry or judgmental as we do that. Manage your expectations and your relationships. Do so in love. 

Withdrawal

It's an interesting word. It's what you do at a bank or it's when you're jones'n for another hit or it's when you deliberately separate yourself from from others. Context is everything when one is engaged in withdrawal.

My concern here is with the last definition. Withdrawal has always been what I do when I can't make life work. I separate from people and sometimes the people I need the most. It's never a pity party as you might think it would be. It is time to think, to re-access and to regroup. For me, it's time off from reality. Things happen in life that I do not understand or that I understand and get PO'd about. It's at this point that I become unpleasant. Ya, hard to believe, I know. Sometimes I overreact.

Late spring was like this for me. I had to run away for awhile. I'm still not quite right, but God has been watching over me through the process. I hope He will shake me loose from my mental stare here soon. He has sent a wide variety of people to my rescue me, or at least I have interpreted it that way.

I am at a point where I am deciding if I'm ready to rejoin the group or..or if I need to join another group. I might just need some more time in the desert too. The heat and severity of the desert often brings clarity.

Perhaps I should explain lest you think I'm being cryptic.

Is it time for me to resume my teaching career at church? A new quarter is approaching. Am I healed enough from my recent bout of apoplexy to serve without serving myself? The answer should be a 'no brainer' I suppose. For me, it's a confusion of fear and doubt with a major dose of pride and arrogance.

I'm still kind of crabby about things.

Then there is the withdrawal. This time, I mean I want another dose of what always and inevitably makes me feel so good. I just love teaching other Christians. The interaction of the classroom brings me joy like nothing else. I want it back.

Those who have a say in such things at church are ready I think. I guess I just have to figure out if I am ready.

Lord, I'm getting restless. I need you to help me get my groove back. There is stuff that needs doing and me doing it....right? Let me know in some way if You agree. Thanks for seeing me through this. I know I am one of your more difficult children. Please assign my stubborn heart a new task. I love you Lord. I look forward to hearing from You.                 

Family Time

Yesterday my Mom's side of the family got together at the club house of Griff's RV park. My cousin Joe and his wife did the cooking. Ribs, hamburgers and hot dogs with an assortment of pies and cookies prepared by everyone else. The BBQ'd ribs were particularly good. They were smoky, spicy and sweet all at once. Delicious.  There was a good group gathered for a hot day in July. We used to do this in December, but it made no sense when the weather was so bad. So it was Christmas in July. My mom's sisters and brother are pictured below along with Dad on the left.

Dad with Uncle Mike, Aunt Bev, Aunt Mary Ann and Aunt Fran

There were many other assorted cousins, second cousins and even some 3rd cousins. None are pictured here. Sorry. I will try to do better next time. A fun time was had by all.

Dilbert Truth

Odd That...

As a cultural observer, I find it amusing the way in which the habits of youth seem to trickle down to the older set and even to the elderly in the present age. It tells me that all wisdom is dying and that we learn nothing from the foolishness of our own youth or the silliness of our immaturity. In our dotage, we have tattoos needled to our hidden and not so hidden parts. We dye our hair unnatural colors of blue and green and magenta as if we were extras on the Rocky Horror Picture Show. We pierce our heads and other body parts in odd places that make certain activities more difficult if not impossible.

It's all just so stupid. My friends, we are old. We look silly when we try to look like the children of our time. And do you know what they will look like at our age? Like us if we were tattooed, pierced and dyed; a wrinkled, sagging mess of gray roots, flab and lack of muscle tone.

Is recapturing a misspent youth so important that we are willing to look ridiculous? Or are we so blind to our aging that we do not see what we have become when we look in the mirror? It's pathetic and I do not understand it.   

Age and seniority should be viewed as a crowning achievement. Instead we spend much time and money trying to hide our age and think it only to be infirmity and approaching death. We should be reveling in what we have learned, sharing it with the younger set and teaching them to prepare for the day. We need to stop living as youth simply because it is a youth culture. The days of "live fast, die young and leave a good looking corpse' have passed I hope. When I die I want my body to be as used up as possible from life. Let there be a closed casket at my funeral because my remains are too ghastly, too scarred by age to be viewed by decent people. Or maybe just cremate what's left. I will certainly be done with it.

Friends, being old is good. Think of the things you have experienced and the things you have learned. It has been a rough ride. Now sit back and relax as your roller coaster car rolls into the station. Quit messing with the natural course of things. Only slaves have marked and pierced bodies. Leave it to others.

The Election

Everybody on the right and left are clamoring about the unmitigated disaster that will occur if candidate A or B is elected and how this is the most importantist election ever.

I have one thing to say about that.

Piffle.

Is it not always this way? Are we not always on the precipice of disaster, doom, depression and gloom without any of them to save us? Piffle.

All of my life, during election time, we are told by candidates, media and political scientists that America's future sits on the razor's edge and that the future of our nation will be irreparably harmed if Joe or Jane Blow is elected president. I am so sick of it. They are like roosters and mad hens posturing in the chicken house over the state of the farm. They can make a real mess, but as long as the eggs keep coming, I don't care what they do.

Presidents are really as toothless as chickens whatever their political bent happens to be. They can do nothing without the cooperation of congress, the supreme court, the military and local and state governments. They have relatively little power even if they are great orators and leaders and can garner the support of even their political enemies. Most of them have been little more than opportunists seeking gain at the public expense by telling their supporters comforting things that they never intend to do anything about. What actually happens in the primaries, conventions and general elections has little to do with reality or the way they end up governing. Nothing gets done that cannot be reversed or even stopped. Presidents are really just figureheads that lead by the consensus of the  military-industrial complex. What we do in the voting booth has little relevance to actual governance. Instead we get power brokers attempting to extend the reach and control of those that actually rule and it is not the people of the United States.

I have not voted since 2008. Our votes are meaningless in my opinion. There is one bi-factional political party in this country all beholden to the same worldwide group of money/power interests that have been running the world since the early 20th century. These people are empire builders and their loyalty is not to the people of the United States or even the world. Their only interest is to keep what they have, build more wealth and gain greater control over the "slaves" and "useless eaters". In a world of robots, they will not even need us. Robots do not eat, they can be fixed and they do not vote or complain about long working hours or where they live or the miserable state of health care.

Trust me. When the time comes that the 'powers that be' no longer need us to create wealth, they will dispense with us post haste. If you do not believe me, Google the 'Georgia Guide Stones'. Their plan is right there in full view of the public. When the time comes, hope that you are necessary to their needs, because if you are not, you will be done. They think we are their property to be used or dispensed with. Whatever.

Perhaps you think that this is the paranoid ramblings of an old man or that Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton will help or protect you. I'm good with that. Live in ignorance. It might be easier. Let CNN or Fox or Rush Limbaugh or MSNBC dictate what you think and do. Be a tool for the Tools.

It's all piffle I tell you! Unplug. Disengage. Stand back and take a long look at the big picture. You will realize, as Barry Goldwater said, "in your heart, you know I'm right".

So what's important then? Jesus Christ and His Kingdom. Everything else is just piffle.

Now you may return to your hand wringing over politics. Good Day to you!              

The Hardest Chapter in Paul's Letter to the Romans

Paul's letter to the Roman church has to be one of his most difficult works. I say this from a personal standpoint. Maybe it's a piece of cake for you eh? If it is, you are missing something my friend. Go back and read it again. Study it. If you go away unconvicted, maybe you do not need salvation.

A little sarcasm and irony there.

I used to get hung up on chapter's 8 and 9 as I tried to apply Paul's advice to my personal life. I would ask, if "God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose", then why did He make me this way (9:20,21)? What I missed, failed to grock, did not understand was, "It does not, therefore, depend on human desire or effort, but on God’s mercy" (9:16). I was consumed by what seemed to be the unfairness of it all. I still chafe a bit when I think about it. Never mind that all flesh is broken and corrupted by sin. That's not my fault. Why should my life be as it is? Are you telling me, if it wasn't this, it would be something else?

The answer to that is probably and unqualified 'yes'.

I have had to accept this. Regardless of who we are, the only way to God is through acceptance of His grace and mercy.

So what about the desire for what is sinful or out of line with God's will? I have sinful desires everyday. My worst is the desire to inflict my unrelenting will on others because I think I know what is right and I know you (whoever you are) are wrong. It is a sin, yet I revel in correcting the errors of others as if it's my divine purpose. Most of the time there is no love in it and there is a place and context for such activity, but I do not present it well and I derive way too much pleasure from it.

Odd no? And then there is the other stuff which I have talked about here and beaten to death and which stands in stark contradiction to my self righteousness. It sort of brings it all into focus and points to the undeniable fact I too need God's grace and mercy, that I too am in the wrong. Lord, that is painful. I hate to be wrong. I hate to admit it. Why is that? Why am I so loathe to seek Your mercy and grace when I need it and why will I not extend it to others? Heaven help me. May it never be.

And that brings me to Romans 12, the hardest chapter in the entire letter to this point. It sets the bar way high and I think maybe it's so we we will realize just how dependent we are on Him.

  Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. ² Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.³ For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. ⁴ For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, ⁵ so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. ⁶ We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your^[a] faith; ⁷ if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; ⁸ if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead,^[b] do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.⁹ Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. ¹⁰ Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. ¹¹ Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. ¹² Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. ¹³ Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.¹⁴ Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. ¹⁵ Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. ¹⁶ Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.^[c] Do not be conceited.¹⁷ Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. ¹⁸ If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. ¹⁹ Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”^[d] says the Lord. ²⁰ On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.

In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”^[e]

²¹ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Now, my first thought is, how realistic is this? Jesus is all these things. He has been here and done it. We are supposed to be like Him as much as that is possible, but how much of this is possible?

What I find is that all of this is possible from time to time, but I can never get it all together at once and then live it consistently. What kind of a living sacrifice am I? Either I am transformed or I am not. Can I vacillate back and forth in a constant flux of transformation without missing the mark? Or is this merely the standard which I must apply as I depend on His grace and mercy for the rest of it?

This is a problem. Consistency is important. Why can't I be perfect? I want to be...I think.

I would guess you aren't there either. Right? So what do we do? Will it only happen after we are dead?

In my advanced years, I have concluded that yes, we will not become perfect until resurrection day. The flesh we currently occupy is corrupt and dying. We cannot allow ourselves to die with it so we must....must throw ourselves on the mercy of God's love. That process is outlined in chapter 12. It is difficult. More difficult for some than others, but it is the only way. It is not magic. It does not just happen. We have to participate in our transformation as we surrender our lives and wills to Him.

Surrender is the key. Submission is beyond the door. Everlasting life is in Him and His kingdom. This is the hardest thing when you are a bit self righteous like me. It has been my lifetime battle. I want to know and do His will, but I can't because mine is in the way. I'm not sure how you shift something that big. God will have to do it. I hope it does not hurt. Sacrifice can be painful.    
     

God's Grace and The Irresistable Power of His Spirit

I witnessed the power of God's Spirit bring grace and healing to someone this morning in Sunday school. It was a beautiful thing. Many of us have walked alone with our burdens for a very long time and it is not easy to open up and talk about them or where we have been or what we have done or what we feel shame about.

For spiritual healing to become reality, we inevitably have to do this for ourselves and for those around us. The guilt must be removed or the healing process never completes itself. More importantly, our struggles are relevant for the healing and even instruction of others. We can go beyond sympathy to empathy in our spiritual battles. We relate. We have been there and we can help. God can and does forgive, but we have to forgive ourselves. Who are we not to forgive ourselves if God has forgiven us? Who are we to say that His grace is not sufficient? When we learn to forgive and love ourselves,  it's only then that we can learn to love others as Christ loves us.

Once accepted, God's grace is an amazing thing...just like the song. Often we think of His grace in terms of sin - the power of forgiveness or the power to resist. What I am coming to believe is that His grace is the power to be and do what He always wanted for us.

When the realization hits you that your sin is gone, your secrets are known and He and your brothers and sisters in Christ still love and accept you - the sky becomes the limit. You begin to break through to the other side and really live with and through Him. This is the sweet spot of faith. It is the place to be.

Paul put it this way in II Corinthians 12:7b-10

  Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. ⁸ Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. ⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. ¹⁰ That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

We all have some kind of thorn in the flesh as Paul calls it; something we do not talk about, that we are not proud of or that may cause us all kinds of emotional and mental anguish or even very real physical pain. 

We need to take it to the Lord and to our brethren and share it. We need to let Him heal us. We need to accept the grace God gives us and move forward as His new creations becoming what He always wanted us to be. We need to love ourselves and each other as His body on earth. His children. This is where we start to become effective for His kingdom.   

There are many inside of church culture today that do not get this. They have led sheltered lives for the most part and cannot relate to some of the suffering the rest of us have to go through. They do not always understand or empathize. I envy them their sheltered lives in some respects, but I thank God for using the events of mine to teach me and enable me to help other wounded warriors. Some of us have been willfully rebellious and angry sinners. Others of us came to despair over things which we had no control. Still others of us experience a mix of both. I would ask our sheltered brethren, please bear with us as we grow into what came so naturally for you. Stand by and watch as the miracle of God's grace unfolds before your very eyes. There are many of us out there. I think we out number you now. God is turning us into His Church. Think about the future. We are it!

May His Spirit watch over us and empower us as we move on toward eternity.

I love you Lord. Thanks for today. It was perfect!   

Do You Hear His Voice?

John 10:25-30

²⁵ Jesus answered, “I did tell you, but you do not believe. The works I do in my Father’s name testify about me, ²⁶ but you do not believe because you are not my sheep. ²⁷ My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. ²⁸ I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. ²⁹ My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all^[c]; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. ³⁰ I and the Father are one.”

It's an amazing thing. Throughout my entire life He has called to me in various and sundry ways - through life situations and events, through people and in my thought processes. In times when I was far away from Him I have sensed His presence. Looking back, I can see how He has watched over me, even in my willful rebellion, guilt and shame. 

I am a believer. I cannot help but be so. He has a hold on me and I can't break it. I have tried. I know as surely as I once had red hair that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. I hear His voice through His word. I hear it in the lives of my brothers and sisters in His church. I see His grace played out in my life and the lives of the newbies to the family of God. His existence is proven through the transformation He brings to His people. Jesus sets people free. All it takes is a little faith. 

All of that brings me to this. If you are a believer and you are feeling insecure for whatever the reason, you should not. Take some personal inventory and go to Him in prayer. He will help you get your mojo back. If you are not a believer, but you have an interest in Him, Take a look at His word. Read the gospel of John. Read the gospel of Matthew. Learn about Him and His teaching. It is an incredible thing. Find a group of believers and ask questions. Pray to Him. Then, if you want to know what to do, read the book of Acts. It will tell you what you must do to join us who love Him. He is waiting to hear from you right now.