Homosexuality is not like substance abuse, alcoholism, gambling addiction, greed, avarice, covetousness, malice, hate or whatever other sin that you want to name. It is hard wired into those of us that have to deal with it. We know the desire long before we ever participate in the behavior. It seems as natural as your desire is for the opposite sex. Further to the point, it is not all about the sex anymore than your marriage is. There is friendship, camaraderie and solidarity in these communities that goes beyond the mere search for a sex partner. It is a sexual desire and behavior common to many throughout the world, through history and across all cultures.
Alfred Kinsey, whatever you may think of him, had a scale of zero to six for Human sexuality.
|0.||Exclusively heterosexual with no homosexual|
|1.||Predominantly heterosexual, only incidental homosexual|
|2.||Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual|
|3.||Equally heterosexual and homosexual|
|4.||Predominantly homosexual but more than incidentally heterosexual|
|5.||Predominantly homosexual, but incidentally heterosexual|
The source is here.
The overwhelming majority of humans are straight. There are about 4% of us that are 6's. This would be me if you are wondering. I have zero heterosexual desire. I like women. The best relationships I have had in my life have been with women. I just never wanted to have sex with one.
I guess my point here is that I never felt like I was given choice. Yes, I know behavior is a choice, but the desire that I have seems quite natural and at the risk of setting your teeth on edge, quite normal.
Back in 1977 and 1978 I had some fairly intense counseling that was designed to create a passion for the opposite sex. It involved hypnosis and something called 'visual imagery'. During hypnosis sessions I would rest the ring and middle fingers of my left hand on a biofeedback device that measured galvanic skin response (GSR). I would be asked to concentrate on the buzzing sound the device made and reduce it through relaxation. I was very good at this. I could get very relaxed very quickly. During these periods I would would be asked to visualize heterosexual coitus while the counselor described it. I have to say that even though I was about as relaxed as a man could get without being asleep, I do not think I was ever in a hypnotic state. There was also the fact that the entire process kind of put me off. I did not trust my counselor (he was weird) and he was talking about things that, frankly, were kind of gross to me. Suffice it to say, it did not work.
I quit counseling in 1978. It was also in 1978 that I met Robert. We lasted about a year and a half. In 1979 I graduated and Robert and I went our separate ways. I should tell you all about Robert some time I suppose. Or maybe not. Some of you could not deal with it. Whatever. He was my first and my last. Ya, I know. I'm not dead yet, but I am just too tired so there will be no man but Jesus in my future. I really want to see Him.
Kinsey summarized his findings (Kinsey et al., 1948:650-51) on the incidence of homosexual behavior among white males in the U.S. population in these words:
"37 per cent of the total male population has at least some overt homosexual experience to the point of orgasm between adolescence and old age. This accounts for nearly 2 males out of every 5 that one may meet.
"50 per cent of the males who remain single until age 35 have had overt homosexual experience to the point of orgasm, since the onset of adolescence.
"58 per cent of the males who belong to the group that goes into high school but not beyond, 50 per cent of the grade school level, and 47 per cent of the college level have had homosexual experience to the point of orgasm if they remain single to the age of 35.
"63 per cent of all males never have overt homosexual experience to the point of orgasm after the onset of adolescence.
"50 per cent of all males (approximately) have neither overt nor psychic experience in the homosexual after the onset of adolescence.
"13 per cent of the males (approximately) react erotically to other males without having overt homosexual contacts after the onset of adolescence.
"30 per cent of all males have at least incidental homosexual experience or reactions (i.e., rate 1-6) over at least a three-year period between the ages of 16 and 55. This accounts for one male out of every three in the population who is past the early years of adolescence.
"25 per cent of the male population has more than incidental homosexual experience or reaction (i.e., rates 2-6) for at least three years between the ages of 16 and 55. In terms of averages, one male out of approximately every four has had or will have such distinct and continued homosexual experience.
"18 per cent of the males have at least as much of the homosexual as the heterosexual in their histories (i.e. rate 3-6) for at least three years between the ages of 16 and 55. This is more than one in six of the white male population.
"13 per cent of the population has more of the homosexual than the heterosexual (i.e., rates 4-6) for at least three years between the ages of 16 and 55. This is one in eight of the white male population.
"10 per cent of the males are more or less exclusively homosexual (i.e., rate 5 or 6) for at least three years between the ages of 16 and 55. This is one male in ten in the white population.
"8 per cent of the males are exclusively homosexual (i.e. rate a 6) for at least three years between the ages of 16 and 55. This is one male in every 13.
"4 per cent of the white males are exclusively homosexual throughout their lives, after the onset of adolescence."